In today’s world nobody is surprised when someone moves to live in another country or marries a person of a different nationality or ethnical background. But when I talk about international dating, I often hear, “It’s probably not a good way to find a partner.” So, why would anyone in their sound mind want to marry a foreigner? Is there something sinister going on?

Why would anyone want to marry a foreigner?

People have no questions about your wanting to travel overseas for a vacation or buying a summer house on distant islands. You also probably know someone who moved to live overseas permanently or married a woman born abroad. But there is still, for some reason, a bit of a stigma attached to dating someone who lives in another country.

Online dating was born 20 years ago and in the beginning the public’s view was, “Only losers date online”. Now the view is exactly the opposite, “Only weirdos and pickup artists try to chat up strangers in bars.”

Sure, it would be wonderful if we all could meet The One through friends or mutual acquaintances. But more often than not, your ideal match is not someone you went to school with.

I envy those lucky people who started dating at 14, married at 21 and live happily for 30+ years. I really do. But there is nothing one can do if this didn’t happen for them. We have to deal with what cards have been handed to us.

Looking for a lasting love and family of your own? That’s the things young women from Ukraine and Russia dream about, too. Family is #1 priority for Slavic women who join dating sites.

Middle-aged and single? You are not alone

You may struggle to find a partner at home, and so are so many people around the world.

One thing that is typical for more traditional societies like countries of the post-USSR, the value of marriage and family is extremely high and the hook-up culture that swept over western countries is looked down upon. Eastern European women don’t believe in short-term relations and one-night stands. At the same time, if a girl didn’t manage to find a partner for a committed relationship by 27, she is not only looked at with suspicions (“What’s wrong with her?”) but also has 9 other single women after one single man, due to demographics discrepancies (86 men for 100 women population-wise).

When most people have paired up, which is by mid-twenties, the ones who are left standing around this game of musical chairs feel very uncomfortable on the dating scene.

Single women seeking serious relationships

Basically, every single girl in Russia or Ukraine over the age of 25 wants to get married.

Not “one day”, but NOW. Actually, yesterday; but if anything, tomorrow. She is READY. She is so ready, she will be happy to move to another end of the planet to make it happen.

Even the wildly negative propaganda against marriages to foreigners (read Russian Brides Horror Stories) doesn’t stop some brave ladies from giving a try to international dating—this is how strong is their urge to Find a Partner for Life and Start a Family.

Tell a Russian girl that you wish “to create a family”, and she will go with you to the other end of Earth. Of course, if she likes you like a person.

Dating Slavic women online has never been easier.

What kind of men Eastern European girls find likable?

Interestingly enough, most often you will hear what kind of man women don’t want. Even the criteria that ladies list in their profiles usually have “Not” in them. It’s because ladies can easily meet men possessing these vices at home. What girls want is someone who is the opposite.

What Eastern European ladies want?

1. A man who is not ugly (not grossly overweight). It’s OK to have average looks; a famous Russian proverb holds, “A man should be slightly more attractive than a monkey.” If you pass this criteria, you are fine. Mostly “ugly” relates to an unkempt appearance. Dress well and you will already be seen as good-looking by Russian girls; that’s their thing.
2. Without bad habits (non-smoker, a light social drinker, no illicit drug use). The biggest concern of women is alcohol abuse, which is a big problem in Russia and Ukraine among men. Drinking hard is the national male entertainment in the countries of the former Soviet Union. About 500,000 people die every year in Russia because of alcohol.
3. Without material problems (having a stable job or income, no impoverishing debts). If you have no vices (see p.2), then your financial health definitely will be in a better shape; substance abuse and money problems go hand in hand.
4. With honourable (serious) intentions—someone who wants to “create a family” as opposed to seeking a quick hook-up or non-obliging fun. The biggest concern of Eastern European girls looking at options of dating foreign men are so called “sex tourists” —men who go to Russia or Ukraine in order to meet several women during the trip, with the view to have sex with all of them. Ladies fear to fall a victim of such a man who will take advantage of her and waste months of her time. They want a man who likes her from the start and views her as a potential marriage partner, not just a stepping stone to prove his ego. (They have enough womanizers at their home countries.)

That’s all!

If you match the 4 main points above, spell them out in your profile and upload a smiling photo in a suit to your online dating profile (Slavic women are crazy about men in suits), you will be inundated with requests from gorgeous women of your own age and slightly younger.

The problem of men seeking wives abroad

The majority of men seeking wives abroad struggle because they want someone substantially younger.

The guy may be 55 or 60 but he wants a woman who is 30-35.

This is not absolutely impossible, but extremely hard and you will come across all types of insincere people, who will try to take advantage of you.

When I explain this to the guys, they say, “Well, if I cannot find what I want, I’d rather stay single.” And he probably will. Not only single, but also single and bitter, after all the scams he exposes himself to.

The reason?

Women 30-35 aren’t looking for men 20+ years older. They want someone up to 40-49 the most.

If you are 55-60, your target audience should be women 40+. There are many amazing and beautiful women of this age, who will be excited to be with a kind and caring man 55-60. This is possible, probable and realistic. And you won’t need to constantly worry whether she is going to leave you after she got her passport, as with a much younger wife. Women 40+ know what they want, know themselves, and make great partners.

But it seems like guys believe all the hype of PPL sites, which promise them young dedicated brides, while skimming their money away dollar by dollar. There is a giant difference between real Russian dating and paid communication pseudo-love. (See: Is dating Russian women real?)

Hundreds of men found lasting love on ElenasModels.com. Is it the most trusted dating site to meet women from Russia, Ukraine, and former USSR. Read the recent dating success stories here.

Want a genuine relationship that will last a lifetime?

If you want a real relationship, you need to take an honest account of your situation and chances with younger women.

Unless you are able to hook up with girls 25 years younger at your home country, stay away from such ladies offering you affection online. There is a type of men who are able to pull it off, but if you are not already dating young starlets at home, leave attempts to find a wife 25 years younger before you get both hurt and bitter.

• In today’s society, Eastern European women will accept a man who is 10-15 years older.

Ladies actually prefer you to be at least 5 years older; it makes them feel secure that you won’t leave her for a younger woman.

Otherwise, if you dream about a marital bliss with a woman who is 20+ years younger than you (a generational gap or more), you are looking for trouble—and you will find it. Or, most likely, the trouble will find you. People who take advantage of unrealistic seekers are aplenty and they see you miles away. Bad photo, arrogant search criteria and language in the profile—they snatch such clients like sharks gobble little fish.

To find something real you need to get real.

What is realistic?

1. Age is the most critical factor when seeking a genuine serious relationship with a foreign woman.
2. The second critical factor is how you dress (if you dress badly, Russian and Ukrainian women may reject you).

This second factor is easily fixable—visit a large department store, they usually offer free stylists, and buy a new stylish wardrobe.

If they don’t offer stylists, ask a male shop assistant for help in men’s department (or a Zara store, if you are on a budget). Explain to your consultant that you are going to be dating young women and need to look the part. (It’s embarrassing, but much less embarrassing than travelling to Ukraine and being rejected after the first date.)

Buy everything new, from socks and underwear to shirts, jackets, pants and shoes. If you are dressed well, you can push age limits of women you are dating by 5-10 years. Is it worth it? Totally!

Do you dream about a happy family and a marriage full of love? This is what girls from Russia dream about, too. Give them what they dream about (a decently looking man who wants to have a family) and they will be exceptionally receptive. It is this strong wish to have a family that drives young ladies to join websites offering introductions to foreign men. There are only 86 men for 100 women in Russia and Ukraine, so finding a committed partner is hard for girls.

Dating by age

• If you are 30-45, you can meet women of any age. Even 18-year-olds easily fall in love with men of this age group. Don’t delay—list your profile right now!
• If you are 18-29, limit your search by girls who are younger. Ladies who are older than you don’t see you as a serious option; you will just waste your time.
• If you are 46-49, that’s the time when you can still connect with women 20-25 years younger, if you are coming on strongly (i.e. chasing them hard). Ladies 30+ will be falling in your embraces by themselves in droves. But hurry up: Once you turn 50, suddenly the stream of pretty ladies chasing you will start drying up.
• If you are 50-59, this is where it’s best to limit your search by women who are 10-15 years younger than you. It’s sad you’ve missed out on all the excitement that men under 50 get on dating sites. But if you are willing to slim down, get fitter, and dress impeccably (no shorts or T-shirts, unless you could be competing in a bodybuilding competition, only elegant shirts and well-fitted trousers allowed), you can push the dating age limits a bit.
• If you are 60+, this is where most women under 50 will view you as “old”. In Russia and Ukraine, 60 is the age when men are eligible for aged pension, so you are viewed as a retiree. Think carefully what you are looking for: The excitement of the thought that a young woman is talking to you online? Then go to PPL sites. Or do you want a devoted companion who will stick with you through thick and thin? Then you need a woman who is not more than 10-15 years younger than yourself.

If you follow this guidance, you will be able to find a genuine woman who likes you for who you are and think you are the best thing that happened to her in her life.

Good luck!

Read also:

• 8 myths about foreign brides—and why they are wrong
• The best age to meet the Russian woman of your dreams
• If you love women, they will love you back
• How to find a good match? – Find the right person for life