Shockingly, most guys who browse websites with pictures of beautiful Russian girls for marriage have no idea what they are getting themselves into. Even with so much data available online, an average bloke from the USA does little to no research on the topic. Horror stories of Russian brides add another dimension to understanding all the facets of international relations.
10 things you must know about Russian girls for marriage
Being involved in the business of international introductions since 1999 (yes, it was a long time ago), my first encounter with the industry was one of a female client. I was one of original post-USSR Russian brides who jumped on the opportunity to meet a foreign partner for a serious relationship with a view to marriage.
Once I found someone I really liked and moved abroad, I started a blog about Russian women and their views on relations with foreigners. From that, dating site Elena’s Models was born, which happened in the space of a few months.
Surprisingly enough, the level of men’s knowledge about Russian girls and their expectations for marriage didn’t change much since then.
This is why I’d like to offer some details that guys who got involved with ladies from the ex-USSR countries wish they knew before they started.
1. It will cost you at least USD 7,000 to marry a Russian.
Most of this money you will spend on government fees and plane tickets. Costs of dating site subscriptions are miniscule compared to the amounts needed for visas and applications, legalizing documents, immigration etc.
But if you compare average prices for a wedding in UK (25,000 pounds) or the USA ($35,000), it’s extremely cheap. An average wedding in Russia with all the bells and whistles will only cost you around USD $6,000. And if you simply walk in and sign the register, you’ll spend less than $500—most aspiring brides from the land of Snow Maidens you meet online will be happy with that. They are so desperate for a husband, just finding a worthy man who is willing to marry her is a priceless gift. No jokes or exaggerations.
Of course, whom she considers worthy is still a mystery for you. Keep reading, I will explain it in detail. Also explore the links you see here, if you want to understand it properly. Make sure you bookmark this page; you’ll want to come back many times. Just follow these tips and you will conquer the heart of any Slavic female from the former Soviet Union. Fail a step, and you’ll never reach the target. So, take time to learn. Information is power to make your dreams come true. It may not make sense now, but once you reach the end of your love journey, you’ll realize how much help it was to know these things.
It will take you about 6-18 months from start to finish, once you have met someone you like, to begin your life together as a couple. If you are ready to move to your bride’s country, this could happen faster, of course. The majority of ladies would be happy if you wanted to move to Russia.
2. You can get nearly any Russian girl by saying you want to marry her.
Marriage is the Holy Grail for females of the largest country in the world. The value of marriage is higher than winning a lottery or becoming a CEO of a public company.
Tell a Russian girl you are looking for a wife, able to support a family, and ready to visit within 2 months, and most women will be happy to talk to you on a dating site—if you have a tidy photo in suit in your profile and nothing off-putting in the text.
Seriously. They barely look at your actual appearance and don’t understand how much money you are making based on your job title (in Russia, lots of things work in reverse—for instance, medical doctors earn peanuts).
3. If you got rejected by a Russian girl, keep writing and she is likely to accept you.
For the reasons that are beyond this brief review, young females from the former Soviet Union are the most impressed not by handsome and wealthy men, but by persistence of the admirer.
Because infidelity is rampant locally, Russian girls are petrified of the husband cheating on her and leaving for someone younger and prettier, as it often happens in her homeland. Women are scared of dealing with desirable male specimen because of fears the spouse might abandon her and she would be left alone in a strange country.
Thus, the fact you got rejected but still kept trying to win her heart makes you stand out from the crowd. She feels you consider her special enough and as such are unlikely to go after another woman in the future. Girls also believe that if a man invested more efforts, he would value his wife more than if it was easy for him.
4. Flowers and small gifts make you a perfect gentleman.
Recently I was reading literature essays in a competition organized by a Russian website for copywriters. The topic was, “My ideal man”.
90% of essays said: The ideal man gives flowers, “always”. You won’t find it in any other culture.
During the courtship stage, starting from the first date (!), flowers are the sign of your following the respectable ritual and having honourable intentions.
Other presents that can be made at any point (you might think it is too much or too early—never fear, there is no such thing with Russian girls):
- Boxed chocolates
- Silver or gold jewellery
Items don’t need to be expensive. But without these things she feels you are not putting enough effort and not really interested in her, and as such, she cannot rely on you as a potential long term partner. Yes, you may have travelled 10 thousand miles but she is more impressed by a pair of gold earrings with the smallest of diamonds than by the fact you went around the globe just to see her.
How to explain it?
She may think you simply travelled to see the world’s most amazing country, Russia, or maybe you have another date with someone else. Or, possibly, it’s just your fun vacation this year.
But if you make a gift, this is the indication of your being invested in the relationship.
Anyway, it’s not rational. And it’s not limited to foreigners, girls feel the same with Russian guys. They are simply used to evaluate the quality of a relationship in this way. It boosts their self-esteem, which is usually low due to the way guys in Russia habitually treat girls.
5. Early intimacy means she doesn’t care about your relationship.
The current trend for local dating in Russia is that a girl is supposed to stay pure until marriage. If a woman cares about your connection, she would be terrified to cross the boundary into intimacy quickly, for the fear of your seeing her as “easy” and then changing your intention to marry her.
6. An unmarried woman is considered defective.
If a lady is over 24, she starts getting worried about ever being able to find a partner for marriage. If she is in a relationship, she is frightened her boyfriend is not going to marry her. The reason for such feelings is that marriage is considered necessary for a woman to be socially important, while for a man it is his career that gives him the reputable status. The woman gets the status by getting married and becoming a mother.
7. All Russians learn English at school for 6 years.
If you chat to sweet girls from any Russian city, they will be happy to explain to you about their foreign language studies at school (6 years) and university (3 more years). They also have to pass an exam at the end of the final year both at high school and in the college. However, you may find that their proficiency in the spoken language is not as high as one would expect after studying the subject for 6 (9) years. It’s because the system is geared to the written word. Talking is not considered necessary at schools.
Normally, it takes ladies about 6 months to start conversing freely, once they move to an English-speaking country. They already have a good vocabulary and know English grammar. They just need to stop being conscious about talking and fearing to make a mistake. It’s all because in their home country they only talk English in a class. They just need to learn to relax and simply blurt it out, rather than try to construct a perfect sentence in their minds.
8. Girls from Russia are extremely patriotic.
You may think that she dislikes living in Russia and eager to swap her country’s passport, but in reality, if you say something even moderately negative about her homeland, she will get greatly offended. Numerous young women told me they would dismiss an admirer if he doesn’t give enough respect to her country.
9. Russian brides are terrified to move abroad.
Again, you’d imagine she can’t wait to get out and would be elated to move countries. But in fact, she is excited about finding love and creating a family, but scared to immigrate. She is unsure how the things will work out in her marriage, will she be happy or not, although the fact she has achieved her goal—marriage—makes it worthwhile in her view. This allows her to fulfil her Destiny as a woman, the highest life goal and purpose.
10. Most websites advertising Russian girls for marriage mislead you.
All the above is applicable to bona-fide Russian brides. But if you are searching online, getting a real deal may be a challenge. In fact, because of the high popularity of gorgeous Russian brides, what you see in the title is not always what you get.
Many websites state they offer dating but in fact what they sell is paid correspondence (pseudo-dating). By the size of the PPL (pay-per-letter) market, such pseudo-dating websites turn over 200 million US dollars yearly, insiders indicate. The shocking part is that federal trading watchdogs of all western countries, including US, UK, European Union states, and Australia allow such pseudo-dating structures to operate and charge their citizens for what is essentially a “phone sex” model without a clear indication by the website what the customer is paying for: Fabricated love confessions.
If talking to a cute Russian beauty costs you every time you press the button “Send” and after a week of communication you still don’t know her mobile number and Skype, you are on a pseudo-dating website.
Time to find out the ugly truth about PPL dating sites, dream factories for gullible single men.
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