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  • Online dating scams: Are you being scammed?

Online dating scams: Are you being scammed?

August 22, 2014
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Comments 50Elena
August 22, 2014

Online dating scams- Are you being scammedHow scary does this question sound, “Are you being scammed?” No one wants to be scammed, ever. But at the same time dating and meeting people involves opening up and being yourself. How can you do it if you are worried about scams?

From its humble beginnings in 90’s, online dating became a grandiose industry with billions of dollars in revenue. People happily admit that they have met online without fear of being judged. This is great news!

Not such great news are reports about online dating scams and scammers that we sometimes see on TV. We’d like to have 100% scam-free environment on Elena’s Models but, unfortunately, it’s unlikely to happen.

  • Individuals scam
  • Companies scam
  • Scammers ring you on the phone
  • Scammers approach you on the street

Banks spend millions on security and they still sometimes have problems. What we at EM can do is to reduce your potential exposure to scams. Working in this industry for over 15 years, we know the patterns.

The first thing scammers do is to try to get you away from the dating site

They need to do get you away from the site quickly because their profiles are routinely discovered and removed. While you may not be highly adept at spotting scammers, we have mechanisms in place that help us eliminate scammers promptly.

This is why we introduced chat and video chat, so that members could continue communicating on the site without the need to leave.

You may say, it costs money, but it actually doesn’t! We have kept the same membership packages as before, only added instant messaging capabilities as a bonus, which, as always on EM, can be used without limitations.

In other words, chatting to a woman doesn’t cost you any extra whether you talk to her for 5 minutes, or 5 hours, or 5 days non-stop. Chat to any woman in your contacts for the duration of your membership. Use all the facilities for a year without paying another dime!

Please realize. We are NOT one of these companies that bill per minute or per email. We are not making any extra money from your staying on the site talking to women or sending mails. If anything, it increases our costs due to the need to have more robust server configuration.

Our advice to stay on the site is based on patterns of successful and safe communication between couples. It’s for your own benefit!

It allows you to control your own:

  • Information
  • Decisions
  • Privacy

The moment you leave, your exposure increases. Our business model provides for successful interactions, because you are not limited due to the need to constantly pay, pay, pay to continue dating women.

Simply keep using the facilities that you already have in your package. If you are a premium member, you have already paid for that, whether you are using it or not. (It’s like booking into a luxury hotel and not using any facilities, which came free of charge.) You are already here, so use it!


Our top online dating anti-scam advice:

  1. Do not leave the website (too quickly)
  2. Do not send money (ever)

Provided you follow those 2 general points, you will be safe. If you see a problem with a profile (disappeared, not available etc), don’t hesitate to ask questions. We are always here to assist and keep you protected from scams.

 

Read also:

  • What is PPL? — Pay-per-letter and pay-per-minute relationships
  • Genuine relationships without scams
  • Talk to women on Skype — Why it works
  • Do these marriages last?
  • MUST READ! The ugly truth about PPL dating sites for Ukrainian women

>> See all BLOG articles (in English)

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CommentsКомментарии ( 50 )

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Misha
Misha
10 years ago

Dear Elena, The girl accepted my EOI and we exchanged five or six mails over a six day period without leaving your site. I offered the girl to maybe if she wishes to use Viber, Whatsapp, Skype, or We Chat apps to speed up the communication. She replied that she’s been using Whatsapp for a while and gave me her number to establish the connection. I haven’t used this app before but I downloaded it and try to use her phone number to reach her. But I would get wrong number message from Whatsapp every time I try to call.… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Misha

The best is to continue communicating on the site. What is the urgency to move elsewhere? If she wants to talk to you, she will. Don’t pre-judge or try to predict an outcome. It will be clear as you continue talking. Also, talk to more than 1 person. It helps you to keep an open mind.

Reply
Guilherme
Guilherme
10 years ago

i never sent Money for nobody that i never see in my life,scammers are without none scruple, a virtual cancer, a group of miscreants that have nothing to do! trying to take advantage of the desperation of loneliness, innocence others! amazing how I still have people falling in these scams in USA from special i saw many cases, i always receive in my e-mails, for me this is no human being, but a walking disease!

Reply
Addison Hoffman
Addison Hoffman
10 years ago

I have been writing letters to women from Russia and Ukraine for some years now. You can write a woman directly but there are red flags you have to watch for. If they start to fall in love with you after a few letters, if they tell you that they are using a translator and are running out of money, if they have lost their job, or had an injury… any reason really that would compel you to send them money, you must resist the temptation!! Simply tell them that as a rule, you never send money to anyone until… Read more »

Reply
Guilherme
Guilherme
10 years ago
Reply to  Addison Hoffman

oh!,oh! in my case since my 34 years old i receive scams out of EM,they try of any way and like-me don’t give up come with sad stories,i’m alone in this world,no parentes,pass starvation,don’t have Money to pay apartment……. big letters pre wrote ,calling you: my dear,yours Tatiana,Inga,Irina….you are the man of my life etc…when we ask for Skype or adress they evaporate!
they try scams any people since men with 20 or 70 years old,but i stay intrigued,yet have people that fall in this scams? is very innocence or desperate..

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Addison Hoffman

You have provided some good common sense advice, Addison, and I am sure members will appreciate your experience. Certainly, your points are valid and have been also documented in articles many times over by market experts and other websites. However, many people fail to take care or notice of these tips, and this is when a person can get themselves into trouble, even when not part of a dating website. I would also like to re-affirm the important rational why a good dating or relationship website fundamentally exists: 1. It provides a more private place to make connections with many… Read more »

Reply
Ирина
Ирина
10 years ago

Здравствуйте, уважаемая Елена! Хочу поблагодарить вас за помощь! Ваш своевременный совет мне очень помог. У вас отличный сайт! Ваши советы помогают людям не совершить ошибок. Еще раз огромное спасибо!

Reply
Bernie Adamson
Bernie Adamson
10 years ago

Elena I would appreciate some feedback and thoughts from you, not for me but for members of your website. I am a member at another website that charges per email and photograph as well as for using Skype, just as a fyi i have never paid for photos or their skype. I am not gullible and as part of my job i also am registered as a PI so i do not get “taken in”. I ALWAYS do due diligence and research Over the course of the weekend I did some research on this particular website and found several claims… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Bernie Adamson

Bernie, I cannot comment on practices of other websites or agencies, since I am not familiar with their internal operations. One thing I can say for EM is that we certainly do not employ anyone to answer letters or EOI’s, and it would simply not be possible since we do not charge for correspondence or chats. If an agency charges for mails or chats (per mail or per minute), then obviously they are making money on that, the more mails and chats go through the system, the more money they make. I think if you are a PI, there is… Read more »

Reply
Landon
Landon
10 years ago

This is my first time go to see at here and i am in fact impressed to read all at single place.

Reply
BP
BP
10 years ago

Way cool! Some extremely valid points! I appreciate you writing this post
plus the rest of the website is also very good.

Reply
Shane
Shane
10 years ago

It’s just absolutely brilliant that EM has now given a chat and a video chat application to the website. There’s now no hurry to leave the website for any reason at all – you can chat here, video verify, send pictures. All the reasons scammers use to give in order to move away from the website.

Reply
james
james
10 years ago

Can someone please tell me the cost of a Ukrainian international passport? as the girl i am talking to (emailing) has ask me to help her buy one – because she wants our first meeting to be in Luxembourg (which i found a bit random), but the price she has quoted seems to be a bit excessive. she appears to be genuine enough, and i have also found her active face book page, which collaborates photos,names and locations she has given in her correspondence. i just need a price check to diminish or elevate suspicion.

regards James

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  james

James, there is no need to send a girl money for passport (no matter how much). Especially if she “wants” to meet in Luxemburg of all places – there are no tours from Ukraine to that country. She should only book a tour from a legitimate travel agent to which you can transfer funds directly (it works the same for Ukrainian girls). A woman who never traveled would choose this way, and a lady who traveled a lot would have the passport! We keep telling men not to send money, why would you even ask? P.S. The legitimate Facebook page… Read more »

Reply
Chillax
Chillax
10 years ago

I think i have been scammed every way possible over the past few years. The PPL/C/V sites are the worst. I came out of a divorce after 17 years of marriage very depressed and desperate to find love. This was when i was at my most vulnerable. I spent literally thousands on these sites and went to Ukraine several times to meet the women of my dreams. It was costing $200/week just to chat with her on the site and they would not hand out emails and every conversation was watched and chats would be censored. Then when i visited… Read more »

Reply
Tangi
Tangi
10 years ago
Reply to  Chillax

I approve your warnings about scams. There’s a saying in France stating that Love is blind. While it often proves to be true, it would be better at the same time to have kind of eyes on the back of one’s head or (like birds) on each side. I corresponded for some time with a supposedly ukrainian girl in 2003 whose name I will omit for decency reason. We exchanged a lot of letters, putting in them even some private or personal things such as my prefered holiday places. Her nice photos were those of a gorgeous blond woman in… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Tangi

Tangi, this is why you should quickly get on video chat (which is free for all Platinum members), so you can see who you are actually talking to.

Reply
Marty
Marty
10 years ago

Chillax do not beat your self up over this experience . you are only one man of thousands who have been scammed over the years …. .. There is a number one rule ,,, if there is no email , no phone number ,no Skype , no go … Its that simple !!! .. Dude your only weakness is you are a man a hot blooded man , and beautiful woman bring you to your knee’s ..!! This marriage and dating business is first all about sex..Sexy beautiful woman and we are all stupid men in their minds .!!!!!!!!!! Chillax… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Marty

Hi Marty, great comment! My pic on the blog was made earlier this year but thanks for the compliment. 😉 It’s mostly makeup and hair, which was curled for the shoot, usually I wear it straight. It’s easy to get a great, professional, good-looking photo, each city has photo studios. You guys would be smart to do it, too, which would put you ahead of 90% of your competition with badly-lit selfies! Girls look at your photos first, and all of your competition also has passports, just like you. Makes sense? 🙂 🙂 Yes, we do advise girls to make… Read more »

Reply
Fabrice
Fabrice
10 years ago

Dear Elena, I have to admit that all you say about scams is absolutely true : someone I had not contacted got in touch with me on a “free” dating site and sent me photos – the would-be 37-year-old actually looked more like 25! I kept receiving emails and pics, sent one pic and had the pleasure to see it in a frame behind the model the next day (Photoshop is your friend, they say)! Why, I even got a phone call! The thing is, I was pretty sure it was a scam so I surfed the web for this… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Fabrice

Dear Fabrice, I am glad it helps. “Phone call” is typical for dating scams “out of blue” on a general dating site, usually it arrives very early in the morning when you are asleep, and lasts not more than 1-2 minutes, then she “has to go”. Or it arrives when you are at work and you get the message on the answering machine. It is so implausible when everyone and their dog uses Skype, and all girls in Ukraine and Russia have mobile phones. Even old grannies have mobiles and use SMS. I am amazed people are still falling for… Read more »

Reply
Viktoryia
Viktoryia
10 years ago
Reply to  Fabrice

About photos I am really confused. From one point, I have many foreign fellows and they say the same like Marty “In reality the beautiful , sexy super model type girls do not want to marry a foreign man ,, they have the pick of the best of their own country”-which is really funny to hear for any girl – the fact is nobody looks like a modern photo shopped photo in the world nor Angelina Jolie or Monica Belucci, just because good photo is a kind of art: position+light+camera+Photoshop+girl with make up and dress. The only thing which belongs… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Viktoryia

Viktoryia, you are 100% correct! I just sent my professional pics to the designer for my VIP Coaching Package for men. My husband looked at the photos and said, “Wow! Is this my wife?” 🙂 🙂 Sure, although I don’t look like this every day. It was model Cindy Crawford who said, “Even I don’t look like Cindy Crawford when I wake up in the morning.” The fact is, NO ONE in daily life really looks like professional photos from gloss magazine covers. Not even Angelina Jolie 🙂 Watch any of the Next Top Model TV series on YouTube, and… Read more »

Reply
Mark
Mark
10 years ago
Reply to  Fabrice

Many of the Photoshop photos are easy to spot. They are pretty much “painted over”. Facial details are softened or removed. They are a modern version of an old photographer technique called “soft focus” – the camera was slightly out of focus to blur out the lines on the subjects face. Now the computer allows an even better result with what previously could only be achieved by an airbrush artist. If the face looks like it has been painted onto a canvas, then it pretty much has been. I’ve actually have photos of a girl untouched and then Photoshop altered… Read more »

Reply
Ray
Ray
10 years ago

I solved the ”scam” problem. When a lady (mostly much younger than me all the time) wants to exchange with me so deeply, when she says she is fond of me and my profile (I am the man of her life), I tell the lady to take the plane and meet me at YUL. The conversation stops immediately… even with a promise to pay back her plane ticket!! Anyway, scamming is easy to discover: younger women, naked pics, sweet words, bad comments on Russian men (rude, alcoholic, etc.) The cam thing doesn’t prove she is serious. Her man may be… Read more »

Reply
Mr. Adam Schwartz
Mr. Adam Schwartz
10 years ago

I sometimes worry about the truthfulness of this site when I read some of these ladies’ “profession ” and occupation.” For example, here’s an actual pair from a profile:

Profession: Economist
Occupation: Yoga teacher

Huh? Makes no sense. It raises a red flag in my mind. And I’ve seen many such impossible pairings on this site.
Sorry to be so honest, but this worries me.

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  Mr. Adam Schwartz

By profession they mean their university qualification, if she says she is “economist” this means she has a degree in economics. By occupation she means what she does for a living. About 64% of people in Russia have university degrees (see more demographics), which is often considered a “must” to get any office job (like receptionist etc). Not all people with degrees work according to their qualifications; most “hands on” jobs like of a yoga teacher pay better than office jobs. You can ask women about their jobs and qualifications if you are interested. They will be happy to tell… Read more »

Reply
Julia
Julia
10 years ago

I want to tell about men scammers. Why you always concentrate on women scamming men. There are many men who scam women. They tell women they want to marry them and then they want to come and see you and ask to stay in your flat. I had a man from Austria who came to visit me and lived at my flat for 6 weeks. And then he said he needed to correct his affairs at home and left. Then I found out he went to another girl to live at her flat in another town. I researched him and… Read more »

Reply
Peter
Peter
10 years ago

Hi Elena! Very interesting! Thank you for the advice, and the answers and comments you have given on this thread. I feel that your information is quite valid, and very important reading before one sets out on a quest to find love in a foreign land…

Reply
Richard
Richard
10 years ago

I have heard this is the best or one of the best sites for meeting real ladies so I will be trying one of the member packages and I’ll let you know how it goes.

Reply
jasper
jasper
10 years ago

I have chatted with scammers few times, they are quite entertaining, their past is very dramatic with dead family, dead dog etc – The scammers I have chatted with are normally from Africa, in the end of a chat, they always ask for money.
The more scammers on a dating site, the more popular you are as a man, the less scammers there are on a dating site, the less popular you are as a man:-)

Reply
DannyBoy
DannyBoy
10 years ago

Dear Elena, I am not proud to tell this, but I have been using a PPL (pay per letter?) dating site for years. I consider myself to be quite intelligent, but unfortunmately also some naive. At the same time I have for quite a long time had a dream to find a girlfriend , preferrably from Eastern-Europe. In my mind many Ukrainian ladies for example – are family-oriented, hardworking, intelligent and feminine. I use to- and try to view people in a positive way, until they have treated me clearly disrespectful and very bad. Maybe I am even too tolerant,… Read more »

Reply
Elena
Author
Elena
10 years ago
Reply to  DannyBoy

Thank you for the kind words, Danny, and good luck!

Reply
Nikos
Nikos
10 years ago

Before 3 years about i was in another dating site and i started to have contact with letters with a girl from Ukraine. After 3 months i asked her to talk eachother on skype by camera. She told me that she has not pc at home and she gave me only her mobile Number. I believed her and we started to speak only by phone. After some months she told me that she wants to visit me in my country but she needs Money for the visa and the tickets. It was my big mistake that i trust her and… Read more »

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Dating Slavic, Russian, and Ukrainian women in a multicultural and international environment that we share today is far from a mail order brides operation, but is an open and transparent experience of people from different locations connecting and sharing their ideas, thoughts, common goals and aspirations, without prejudice or borders. This blog allows you to learn more about modern life in countries of the former Soviet Union, including Ukraine and Russia, which is, most likely, very similar to what you are used to in your own country. In fact, you have more in common than you probably think.

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