Last night I watched a TV show called My online bride. The British TV program followed 3 UK men who wanted to meet foreign women with a view to marriage. Two of them went to Thailand, and one to Ukraine.
Only one guy got married, and he already knew the Thai lady he was dating after meeting her through friends at a party. He made 6 trips to Thailand to see her and spend time together, and then they got married. 6 months after the wedding in Thailand, she received her visa to UK and joned him in his country.
Search for a Bride
Thai bride tries to convince her speedy groom not to give up on her and pay the money to her family, “No play game, I am serious.”
The second guy went to Thailand with an organized romance tour by a well known online dating agency, specializing in introducing foreign women to USA and UK men. He managed to meet a woman during so called socials, proposed, and was accepted. However, her family requested him to pay several thousand dollars in order to marry her, as well as ongoing support after she moves overseas. He called it off, and later found out that the lady he got involved with already had a boyfriend at the time and was pregnant with a child, so the whole dating thing on the tour was a setup.
The third guy who went to Ukraine already had an online relationship with a nice girl from Kiev, and it was going so well, he was invited to stay at her apartment. On the second day of his visit they became intimate, but for some reason he decided he could do better. He went to a marriage agency and signed up to see more women. He met them one by one in a cafe, and some of them liked him, too. He decided to move out of his girlfriend’s apartment, and rented his own place in Kiev. His demeanor completely changed, he became confident and even cocky, and kept talking he didn’t need to settle for the first available variant, and needed to explore his options. He was still dating the Ukrainan woman he came to meet, apparently motivating it by the need to take it slower.
How TV Format Influences Relationships
Over the years, I have been contacted numerous times by TV and movie producers. More often than not, the final result is oriented to confirm the official angle that women are doing it to get out of powerty and move to a better country. Watching these programs make me cringe.
After success with his online Kiev’s girlfriend, Mike from UK decided he should explore his options before committing to one woman.
I know how different it is in real life and how strong are the feelings and emotions when real people meet each other and start a relationship. Men and women can’t stop thinking about each other, talk online for hours daily, and establish a genuine connection. I went through this process myself and I know how it works. It has nothing to do with “buying a bride”, it’s simply a relationship with someone from another country.
However, I never see these things in movies or TV programs. Maybe people with genuine intentions do not wish their relationships to be featured on TV screens, or the casting process does have the goal of finding men who behave like sexist brats. With all the nice and sweet people I meet daily through my working in the online dating industry, somehow in the TV shows I only ever see people portrayed in a negative light.
Certainly, we know that reality TV is not actually real. A day of shooting usually gives 2 minutes of screentime, or even less. The first thing TV producers decide upon is an angle, and then they try to conduct interviews in a way that proves their point, and after that they edit it more, often cutting phrases and scenes out of the context.
Real Relationships
Still, we know that thousands of people login daily to online dating sites and talk, and many of them meet in real life and establish genuine relationships. Some of them become so attached to each other that they decide to get married and have kids. Every month we receive photos and stories from couples who met on Elena’s Models and fell in love.
Online distribution of working resources is the fact of life. Even the largest of companies in the USA, UK, Australia, and Europe outsource jobs to India or Philippines. China is producing the majority of toys and furniture for the whole planet. In the world of global economics, it’s only a matter of time before the social landscape follows the trend.
Happy EM couple — Simon and Tatsiana
Read also:
- International dating online — Why meeting foreign women is smart
- Why Ukrainian, Russian women want to marry foreigners
- Give online dating a try — The story of Lothar and Tamara (Germany-Belarus)
- Can I really meet someone? — The story of Simon and Tatsiana (Australia-Belarus)
Hi Elena, I have a question. I’ve been talking to a great lady I met on your site for two weeks. We exchanged 5 letters on your site the first 3 days and she gave me her number and now we text each other 5 days a week for 1 hour and 30 minutes each time using “what’s app.” The only problem is when I ask to get on video talk using viber (which is a free app she has, its free to talk international and it’s just like skype just on your phone), she text me and says “My… Read more »
Michael, read this:
How to ask women to talk on Skype
In general, you can start by letting her see you on video first, and then she may feel more comfortable talking on camera. Girls are crazy about “looking right” for your first “date”.
Hi Elena! I saw “My Online Bride” on my tablet last night and found it intriguing to say the least. I didn’t like Mike’s approach after he had gotten intimate with the lady he had been chatting with. I don’t understand why he didn’t stay with her instead of playing the field. On the other hand, I’m glad Chris stood his ground and didn’t cave in to the attempted bribery of the Thai woman. You’re right, however, in that I don’t think this (and other programs) accurately depicts what really happens in international dating. I’m sure there are scams from… Read more »
Melvin, I think it’s not only to maximize ratings but also to deter men from seeking someone abroad in general, to support the official viewpoint. But I think it’s also the issue that most people wouldn’t want their love story be in front of cameras. It’s hard enough to establish a relationship, would you want a camera crew following you everywhere? 🙂 I know I would not. Thus, I feel that only people who are very egotistic and a bit of narcissists, go on these programs. It’s like “Bachelor/Bachelorette” franchise: Would you want to be there? Yes, if you are… Read more »
Hi Elena I haven’t seen my online bride but having had experience of reality TV I know that all they are out to do is to create “interesting television” which is another word for a manufactured programme made up from the exciting bits as they see it. After all boring normal everyday life where a guy goes abroad meets a girl and falls for her happily ever after will not generate good TV ratings. It does not speak so highly of our own desire for car crash entertainment over a story with a happy ending. Sad really. On a more… Read more »
Hi Paul,
You probably right about it, happy stories don’t make good TV, it’s all boring for viewers, isn’t it? 🙂
On the other hand, betrayal and drama make it fun to watch and feel better about ourselves. Good observation!
Hi Elena, I was searching for that show the other night but I could not find it. However, I did find the show “90 Day Fiance” that shows on TLC and that show just stressed me out watching it. There was one couple on there that didn’t have that many problems but that is because they had talked for over a year and the guy visited her in her country, which was Brazil, a bunch of times before the 90 Day Fiance visa. However, I believe with any relationship leading to marriage that regardless of whether the woman is from… Read more »
Trevor, We all know TV tries to put dramatic spin on everything, creative editing turns molehills into mountains. 🙂 I agree with you that rushing into marriage is not a good thing, although in Russia and Ukraine it’s still not unusual for young people to wed after knowing each other for 1-2 months. Mind it, they get married at 18-21, and have kids straight away. This is why single Russian and Ukrainian girls at 26 become desperate to find a partner, and start considering options that they wouldn’t look into before (such as meeting someone from another country). The more… Read more »
For me it is strange to search for love. Love can not be found, love can be met. But I am glad that many people managed to find the partner they can be happy with. And making friends and meeting new people in the Internet is a normal and simple practice now.
Hi Elena, My name is Maurice, and I was on the same relationship tour in Thailand. You are exactly right about the producers of the show using only a small part of the footage to depict only the story they want. I was actually featured in the documentary talking to Chris….(something I regret). The producers go to great lengths to get you to agree to be shown. If I had known how it was going to be portrayed, I simply would not have agreed. As for Chris, well he brought a lot of his drama on himself. His trip was… Read more »
Maurice,
Thank you for your comment. I think if people knew that a person’s tour was sponsored by the company under the guise of “an independent report”, they would be able to understand what happens better. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Maurice, sorry about the issues you’ve had with the production company, but in the film you come off as an understanding person just trying to help a fellow tour member. I don’t think you need to regret your segment of the documentary. I know you have insider knowledge of how everything played out, but you end up coming off as a decent person in my mind.