Mothers have a big influence over young  women, as well as their husbands. So much so that psychologists give tips to young wives how to handle an overly protective or intrusive mother-in-law. You may be surprised about some of these suggestions!

Tip on handling an intrusive mother-in-law

It’s not easy for westerners to understand the extent of intrusion by parents, especially mothers, into lives of their kids in Russia.

Of course, if you get married to a woman from Russia, she will most likely move to your country, unless, of course, you wish to join your bride. But even in this case you probably are doing to visit the family.

In the best case scenario, your mother-in-law doesn’t speak English and you don’t speak Russian, this means you won’t be able to communicate freely, which limits the exchange to just smiles and greetings.

But if one of you is able to speak the other language, these tips on how to prevent intrusive comments by a mother-in-law from Womanhit.ru could be useful.

1. Ignore

The simplest thing is to ignore the unreasonable parent, if they seem to become overly expressive. You may want to not pay attention or get away and go for a walk, for instance.

2. Say “No”

Suffering because you are hesitant to say “No” may build resentment. It’s easier to politely but firmly refuse to do things you don’t wish to do.

3. Stay busy

If you don’t feel like talking or listening, simply say that you need to do something right now, and get away. Do it quickly.

4. Joke about it

If the mother-in-law is making comments about your ability to do something, which she finds unsatisfactory, you can make a light joke in the style, “Well, kids tend to mirror their parents” or something like this. Keep it light and inoffensive.

Flowers can solve a lot of problems in relationships with ladies from Russia, no matter how old or young they are. The rule of thumb: If in doubt, bring flowers for the lady!

Final tips

Russian mothers love their kids dearly and often the daughter will be the only child. Try to get the potential mother-in-law on your side.

• Bring a bunch of flowers and a cake to a dinner at her house, or just the bouquet if you are meeting at a restaurant.
• Don’t drink alcohol or just drink one glass of champagne that you ordered for the ladies, to celebrate the occasion. Alcohol abuse is rampant in Russia (although not all Russian men are hard drinkers), so the mother may be worried if you drink more than one glass of liquor.
• Pay her compliments and attention. Invite the parents to a restaurant to show respect (or just the mother if the parents are not together).
• Open doors for her and offer your hand when exiting transport. It’s a polite gesture that a gentleman is supposed to offer to all females in the group. She will think you have good manners.
• Don’t try to talk to her too much if she doesn’t speak the language well, as she may feel embarrassed about it. Learn a couple of Russian phrases and use them. She will be delighted.

It’s not hard to charm the mother of your Russian girlfriend. It’s always great to have her mother on your side.

Good luck!

Read also:

• Top-5 reasons to marry a Russian woman
• How to meet women with traditional family values?
• 13 signs of a cheating wife
• Is it still worth to try to find an Eastern European wife?