If you love women, they will love you back. But if you hate women, they will hate you back. This is how it works. It works just the same for women: If they love and respect men, only then it’s possible to get the same feelings back.
Being disappointed counts as baggage
There are people with unfortunate life experiences who fancy thinking about themselves as realists, but they are simply sabotaging their own potential success by a pessimistic (and often misogynistic) attitude.
If something bad happened to you, it doesn’t mean it’s the rule or this is how everybody else’s relationships are going to end. There are people for whom it works perfectly, living in happy relationships for decades and longer.
Being spiteful or cynical is not attractive. Vice versa, it’s depressing, and no person wants to feel depressed. What people do, they avoid negative individuals. The only company cynical folk may find is online, where lonely and rejected tend to congregate (they are unable to bear each other’s company in person). Being a frequent contributor to Internet forums is a diagnosis. Happy people have better things to do.
How to bring kindness and love back into your life
Love and kindness aren’t hard to find. There is a generous portion of these assets inside your soul. Reconnect to your kind and loving self, and sun is going to shine brighter and women will smile at you more.
There are psychologists and relationship coaches who can assist in sorting out the past baggage. It does help to talk to someone unbiased and professional. These consultants see people with problems every day and it’s their job to help clients to move from unhappy and frustrated to satisfied and peaceful.
The starting point is to forgive. First of all, forgive yourself for making these mistakes. You were not as experienced at the time as you are now, and it’s in the past. Learn the lesson that life was trying to teach you and move on.
You are aware that today is the first day of the rest of your life, right? Make it count.
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“Being a frequent contributor to Internet forums is a diagnosis. Happy people have better things to do.”
Whoops. So I shouldn’t be posting this, right? 😉 :p
Sorin,
You got the drift 😀 😀
Elena, I am having trouble deciding if a recent set of short email messages from my Russian girlfriend are sincere and literal messages trying to terminate our relationship or if they reflect a serious and erroneous message from me that insulted her and she wrote back in complete anger and hurt. Do Russian women write letters to terminate a relationship with very offensive and insulting words or do they generally write with polite respect that they are no longer interested in pursuing the relationship? I could post the Russian phrases but my autism gives me a great deal of trouble… Read more »
Roger,
It’s hard to say and it depends on the individual, how they express themselves. But the last phrases you mentioned are probably due to the fact you didn’t try to “grab her ass”, which is what women are used to see happening in relationships with men and she has to “resist”.
Read about hunter-prey dating model that Russians practice culturally.
My opinion is that people can’t become happy after some pity events because they think too much about their fails, they can’t leave it in the past. First step for rehabilitation is to forgive and after that to have an active life, if you have many interests and if you are interested in life, life gives you all the best.
I think some people, both men and women, focus so much on their past hurtful experience that they forget to actually live and enjoy life. The first step to becoming happy is always to forgive and leave your pain behind. Hating others won’t make you more satisfied with yourself or your own life.