If you want to marry a Ukrainian girl, it’s important that her mother approves of you. Findings of Norwegian scientists prove the fact that the mother’s opinion strongly influences of a young woman’s choice of a marriage partner.
Want to marry a Ukrainian girl? Make sure her mother approves
Scientists from the University of Science and Technology in Norway Leif Edward Ottesen Kennair and Robert Biegler designed a research to find out how mothers influence their daughter’s decisions in choosing a mate. It’s well documented that mothers often disapprove of their daughters’ choices, which is called the Juliet effect: Mothers and sisters don’t like girls’ cute boyfriends. Sometimes it causes an opposition between parents and their daughter, Science Daily reports.
Most mothers want their daughters to marry a steady and financially secure guy. Sisters are also likely to support their mother’s point of view. Such behaviour is genetically determined, the researchers say.
Genetics explain the conflict quite simply: a woman chooses for herself an attractive partner because such a man potentially possesses good health, which is important for getting good genes for the offspring.
A healthy man allows a woman to get genetically competitive offspring and transfer more of her genes to future generations.
But a sister or mother would prefer a financially steady and kind guy who is able to support his family. It’s more beneficial for female relatives, who hope to get some of the benefits for themselves.
If a woman marries a poor and handsome man, this could create negative consequences for her family. The family would have to spend its resources to “feed” the newlyweds plus potentially provide for their kids. The mother and the sister may be required to help in child rearing and home chores. It would deprive the parents family of resources.
The scientists questioned young women to check their theory.
The girls were supposed to describe an ideal partner for themselves and their sisters.
Most of respondents used equal characteristics to describe a partner for themselves and their sisters. Loyalty, honesty, reliability, and integrity gained the maximum points. However, when asked what traits were more important in their own partner, students gave different answers. The girls decided that understanding, empathy, responsibility, helpfulness and kindness were more important in their sister’s partner. For themselves, they first of all wanted a partner who was sincere, humorous, charming and sexy.
The authors of the study add that mothers also wish their daughters to find steady guys able to provide for their families.
The scientists underline that modern Norwegian women choose men predominantly for their attractiveness, not for their financial situation. Western women are independent and self-assured. They are not worried about their kids not being able to survive. Western women marry later in life, which contributes to their financial independence.
This leads to the situation where women would rather choose attractive partners for themselves but would recommend their sisters or daughters to marry guys who are well off and unlikely to stray.
Women from Russia and Ukraine belong to the world with strong traditional values. They marry early in life. Russian people believe that the right age for marriage for a woman is 24 years old. Women’s families and, especially, their mothers influence them greatly. Russian and Ukrainian mothers are very open in expressing their opinions about potential lifetime mates and whether they believe the daughter is making the right choice. Sure, there are different situations but in most cases the family’s opinion is extremely important for a young woman, who has never been married before.
So, if you are hoping to marry a Ukrainian girl, try to get her mother on your side. It’s essential to be seen as an appropriate mate by her family.
You need to impress not only the girl but also her parents. It’s not too complicated, although there are some cultural issues that you need to be aware of.
(Check VIP coaching program for tips, the cultural protocol is explained there in a great detail.)
In short, most Russians and Ukrainian like foreigners. Be polite, invite her parents to a restaurant and bring some appropriate presents for all family members. Give flowers to the girl’s mother. Women from Russia love to receive flowers from men. Behave correctly when visiting the family home.
By the way, the findings of the research demonstrate that marrying a foreign guy could be seen as a perfect option by a Ukrainian or Russian family. If the mother’s main goal is to find a good and stable partner for her daughter, a nice guy from abroad may seem just perfect for the girl’s parents and sisters. Following the correct protocol will ensure the family’s approval.
The researchers point out that their study has nothing to do with moral principles. It’s pure genetics that powerfully rule all of us and we do not even notice how our wishes and desires are being manipulated by these little managers. (See also The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins.)
Ukrainian and Russian culture prioritizes traditional values. Women from these countries are highly influenced by their mother’s opinions. But even females from western countries are still looking up to moms to decide whether to accept a guy as a permanent partner, as this study shows.
Share this article
“You never told me you had a sister!”
“No, that’s not my sister,” she will say. “That’s my mother!”
“Oh really?! She looks so young! Now I know where your beauty comes from!”
That’s how you do it guys. And then you give her mother flowers and chocolates and she will be your strongest ally in your quest to win you lover’s heart. 😉 :p
Henk,
There is 1 thing that doesn’t make sense: How come you are still single? 🙂 🙂
Exactly! Just – why are you still single? 🙂
Because he ate the chocolates, and give the empty box to the mother.
Well, it was interesting to read it. But I think that everything depend on the person itself. Someone has strong connection with mother of sister. And their opinion is vety important. And someone don’t. Due to my personal experience, it was more important what my father would say about me fiancee. And I have a friend. She said that it doesn’t matter what her parents would think about him, she loves him and thats only matter.
“Old school” was saying to get married at twenties, but nowadays it’s changing. May be it depends on place to place, but my encircling was not really thinking about family before 30. As for me, I believe in late marriages, I think they are stronger because partners know themselves better and know what they want.
Dear ! a man only trust woman between 18-25. a woman after 30 if not married yet, she probably has some issues and bad history! she will never be a good wife or good mom. because of the old loooong histories! If you think you wait long time, I advise you not to do so. have a good day)
I am not Ukranian, but I am sure that mother’s opinion is the most important point of view for me. Mother is the first person in a man’s life and we all must respect our mothers and seek for their approval! Mothers know what is better for us.
In my opinion, not only in Ukraine, but in all countries of the world all mothers and their families hope that their daughters will marry to a wealthy man. To be honest, it’s very good if your spouse is wealthy and can provide for his family at all. Even your spouse is very rich, but you don’t feel love to each other it is so bad. The main thing is to have respect and love for each other and all the other things you can work hard together and achieve.
This is interesting to read. I once dated a Ukrainian woman and mother of two boys (I’m also a divorced father of one girl). I visited her in Odessa six times…and we took small holidays three times over a year-long courtship.The weekend of 1st of September 2014 I was in town to help her move into a new flat, buying her children new beds to sleep in. I paid her rent and I paid for her boys’ education. Every time I visited I brought gifts for her friends and family. Of course, I always had flowers delivered to her, even… Read more »
Christian,
Sugar daddy relationships tend to be this way…
Elena- it is interesting you make this comment about Christan- unless you have an insiders knowledge to his age and the woman he was dating(her age), you really can not make the assumption that he is a “Sugar daddy”. He is in the top 2% that got on a plane and went to see her, not once, but six times. In most of your articles, you tell us men to go see the girl, relationships do not happen sitting behind a computer screen, they happen face to face.